“The Talk”

I should mention, before I begin, that I am in the midst of end-of-the-semester insanity.  I’m trying to complete my last three assignments (long papers), work my two jobs, have friends, AND see The Poet.  So forgive me if I seem scattered or absentminded….I am.

Yesterday was an incredible day. The Poet and I had plans to get together, but as usual, we hadn’t set anything concrete and only got around to talking about what to do in the late afternoon.  It was such a beautiful day that we decided to get coffee and go for a drive to the ocean.  The whole way there, he kept looking at me and smiling and telling me how much he had missed me (we hadn’t seen each other since Monday).  Once there, we sat in the car for awhile talking.  After a few minutes of random conversation, we had this one:

The Poet: Hey, I wanted to ask you something….

Me: (Nervous laughter) Ok…

The Poet: So….I’m not seeing anyone else-

Me: (Cuts him off) Oh, me either.  Was that your question?  I mean, sorry to cut you off.  Is that what you were going to ask?

The Poet: Good.  Yeah, that’s what I was going to ask.

Me: Yeah, I disabled my profile and told all those hangers-on to get lost. (Giggles.)

The Poet:  Awesome- so….same page.  Again.  I like it.  I like you.

Me: I like you too.  (Blush)

The night continued with us driving around some more, having a nice dinner of shared appetizers, and hanging out at his house for awhile.

The same-pageness of this relationship has been unreal.  We are always thinking the same thing and bringing it up at the same time.  I was planning to bring up the talk yesterday, but he beat me to it.  It’s a really nice feeling.

Ok- just wanted to pop to the surface to fill you in, but now I have to go back under to get my work done.


3 days, 2 dates, 1 happy FRJ

My second date with The Poet sounds exactly like our first date- we got drinks, talked and laughed for hours, went back to his house and talked and laughed some more, then slept- except this time it was on a weekend night, so we slept in and had a more relaxed morning.  We connected so instantly and intensely.  Although it seems cliche and it pains me to admit it, we already finish each other’s thoughts…and I really like it.  All the things that are difficult for me in a relationship don’t seem difficult with him.  I don’t feel afraid to be open and let him into my heart.  I am comfortable admitting how I feel and telling him what I want.  I know that he is physically attracted to me, but I am not worried in the slightest that it is his only motive, or even his main motive.  Somewhere in our 12 hour date on Friday/Saturday, we talked about the terrifying, but incredible, fact of how much we like each other.  Anyone who knows me would know that these are normally major hurdles for me. I would listen quietly while someone told me they liked me, then either make a joke or sit in uncomfortable silence.  I rarely tell people how I feel, even when I want to.  I do, of course, give myself some credit for this- it isn’t all about The Poet- but he gets a large share of credit too.

Since today is Easter, we hadn’t planned on seeing each other.  I had a lot of homework to work on and he had a large family gathering to attend.  But this morning he called to see if I could get away for a “quick” coffee.  We ended up spending three hours drinking coffee and driving around Massachusetts.  We found the most beautiful historic church (a historic site no longer in use) in the middle of nowhere and walked around.  We talked about the future in a very natural way- there was no discussion of details, just a sense of “in our future,” if that makes any sense.  He is old fashioned in a way that I like.  He always opens the car door-actually every door- for me, even when it seems inconvenient.  He put his jacket on me after I told him I didn’t need it, but he could see that I was cold.  At the same time, he is respectful, interested, and thoughtful.

The Poet is also a musician and he is releasing his next album in September.  He let me listen to one song on Friday and another today while we were driving.  Usually I get nervous when I am listening to someone’s music with them around and I don’t know how to act.  This time, he was so clearly nervous for me to hear it, I couldn’t be nervous.  I was, however, incredibly relieved to realize that I actually really like his music.  I can honestly say that it is something I would choose to listen to on my own, even if I didn’t already like him and have a motive.  🙂  Great news!!  I am planning to buy his book and read it.  It got great reviews when it came out, but I don’t know how well I would do reading them in front of him for the first time.  So I am going to prep myself a little.

In related news- I had still been seeing TBDP and had been planning to go to an Easter party at his house today.  Things had been pretty steadily in the friend-zone with TBDP until Thursday night, when he really kissed me for the first time.  Poor TBDP.  He is really sweet, and I actually do like him, but he just got totally blown out of the water.  I decided  it was unfair to go to the party and meet his friends under false pretenses, so I told him that I had too much work to do, which is actually true.  I plan on telling him pretty soon that I met someone that I have a really strong connection with, but would like to be friends.  I don’t know how that will go, but I definitely have to tell him.  The Poet and I have not discussed the issue of seeing other people, but I know he isn’t seeing anyone else, and regardless, I don’t want to see anyone but him.  I’m not saying I am putting all my eggs in one basket (Easter reference!!) after just three dates…I just think there is something special here and it deserves my full attention.

I have a feeling about this…. 🙂

The Poet

I had the most incredible first date last night.  It was, hands-down, the best date I have ever had and it lasted for 9 hours.

The Poet found me on OKC and I almost didn’t respond to him.  I am SO glad I did.  We connected instantly online, but that doesn’t always mean it will be good in person.  Originally, we were supposed to go out last Thursday, but he texted to cancel half an hour before the date because he was sick.  I considered not giving him another chance….but I am SO glad I did.

He picked me up and we went out for drinks.  We talked about everything- his books, his records (he is a poet and a musician), our childhoods, our last relationships…  We closed down the bar, but it was clear that we didn’t want the date to end, so he invited me over to his house for a beer.  We talked and talked and laughed a ton.  We kissed a little too…  Before I knew it, it was almost 4 am and we both had to be at work at 8.  We decided to take a nap for a few hours and then he would bring me home.  We woke up tired and groggy, but both grinning….a state I have remained in all day.

I just got to my second job where I googled him to see how well known he is.  And I was already super impressed by him, but now I am doubly so.  He’s the real deal.  Not some lame dude (like Rat Bastard) who wants to be a poet/musician.  He is actually a published author and musician and has lots of other impressive things on his resume.  Better than all the stuff he has done is the way he was with me.  Humble but confident, kind and funny, and interested in me.

I just can’t stop smiling. 🙂