TBDP

Onto Tall Ballroom Dancing Physicist (TBDP)….

Another man in my life right now is TBDP. I call him that because that’s what he is- a tall, ballroom-dancing, physicist. Our online interaction began with a conversation about our mutual love of dancing (my profile says that I used to be a competitive ballroom dancer as well as currently being a belly dancer) and we went back and forth with several messages about dancing for awhile. Eventually, he asked me to meet him for a drink. At that point, it wasn’t exactly clear to me if we were romantically interested or just interested in knowing each other for dance purposes- it is always good to know people in the dance world because it can be a little hard to break in otherwise.

Our first date was really fun. We met just for cocktails and laughed and talked about dance (and many other things). He is very smart (most physicists are) and is only marginally socially awkward, which pleasantly surprised me. (I don’t mean to stereotype, but come on….a ballroom-dancing physicist ranks relatively high on the list of people likely to be socially awkward.)

The second date was swing dancing.  Super fun!  I don’t know if it’s just because I am a dancer or if all women feel this way, but there is something incredibly sexy and enticing about a man who is a good dancer.  Especially this type of dance, where the man has to be a leader, assertive and strong.  We went out for drinks following the dancing and had a really nice time.

I think he is really trying to move this from a potential dance friendship to a dating situation because we have plans for dinner and a movie, “The Artist” on Wednesday night.  We have yet to kiss, so it will be interesting to see how that goes.  Regardless of how this whole thing shakes out, he is a good connection and I am going to do what I can to keep him in my life in, at the very least, a dancing capacity.

 

And that, my friends, is irony…

Last Friday I went on a first date with The Philosopher. We met for coffee in the morning. It was my first, first day date. He was smart and funny and fun to talk to. There wasn’t one moment of awkward silence and we covered lots of interesting topics.

For the first time, I was actually really excited by the prospect of a second date instead of ambivalent about it. I thought he had a good time too.

Later that night, I sent him a message saying I had a good time and enjoyed talking with him. I didn’t hear back from him until the next day, at which point he wrote and said “it was a pleasure meeting you also!”

I hadn’t heard anything else, so I wrote again saying that I had a really good time and would love to do it again if he was interested.

No response. It figures that the ONE time I am actually excited about a guy he doesn’t want to see me again…meanwhile there are several guys I don’t really care about that won’t give up.

ARoomie (I recognize that it’s a little weird to get dating input from him after everything that’s gone on) says I’m only still interested in The Philosopher because he doesn’t seem that interested in me. ARoomie thinks all guys should behave this way to keep women interested… I don’t know- maybe he’s right to some extent, but I was interested before he started ignoring me, so maybe it’s guys who don’t like it when a girl acts interested.

All I know is that there is at least one guy in Boston who doesn’t want to go out with me (though I’m sure there are more)- and it’s the guy that I want to go out with. And that, my friends, is irony.

GDG

Green Day Guy (GDG) was not someone I would normally have considered going out with.  However, he made a first date offer I couldn’t refuse: drinks, a show, and then dinner and drinks.  He took me to see American Idiot, which was awesome, and to a yummy dinner after.  It was a great first date and we had a good time at dinner.  I left pleasantly surprised by the whole thing.

We just had our fourth date on Sunday.  I’m not sure what it is exactly, but we seem to be slightly off somehow.  The beginning of our dates are always kind of slow and I always think “ok, this will be the last date.”  Then something happens halfway through (maybe when the drinks start kicking in) and we start laughing and relaxing into it.  So I start thinking “maybe this won’t be the last date.”  He always picks me up and takes me home after.  There is never more than a short kiss goodbye.  As I’m walking in to my house I think to myself “ok, maybe this really will be the last date.  I think I’m done and he doesn’t seem that interested either.”  But then I get texts over the course of the week….flirty and asking me out again.  I can’t figure this out.

I honestly like him.  He’s nice, he owns his own home- a house-, and has a good job.  He’s funny and seems to like me the way I am, but knows how to tease me gently about things.  Even with all these things, I feel pretty lukewarm about him.  I don’t see it going anywhere with him really, but I do see him in my life somehow…

Anyway- I was thinking I was done with GDG, but today I got some messages from him and it seems like he wants to go out again.  I have no idea…